A renowned author in her article, "Why People Stay in Abusive Relationship," explains why victims of abuse remains loyal to their abusers.  She writes: "Relatives and friends often ask themselves why someone would remain in an abusive relationship.  It's difficult to imagine, but there are many reasons to stay and to the victim, they are good reasons."  The author goes to enumerate the factors that keep victim trapped in their domestic nightmares:

Children.   A woman often stays in an abusive relationship because of her children.  Ironically, she will often leave because she realizes her children are being adversely affected by living in an abusive atmosphere..  "I didn't want my kids to grow up without a father," says a freelance writer who lived in fear for eight years.

Pure fear.  A woman may have been told over and over that if she leaves the relationship, terrible things will happen to her.  He may have convinced her that no matter where she goes, she will find her and never leave her alone.  Threats are used as an effective technique to keep someone in a relationship, which is the goal of the abuser. She may also fear living alone and the prospect of trying to support herself and children.  Or he may have threatened to kill her, the children and himself.

Financial fright.  A kindergarten teacher revealed that she stayed in an abusive marriage for seventeen years because she was afraid of not being able to give her children the kind of life that their father could.  Money talks in abusive relationship says a psychologist.  The abused woman often earns less money than her husband as may not work because if his objections.  She is told that if she leaves the relationship, she will have great difficulty supporting herself.  He may threaten to make trouble for her on the jobs if she is employed.

Marriage vows. Sometimes, when a woman turns her church for assistance, she is told she must stay in the marriage, because of her vows.  A psychologist reveal that the vows don't oblique you to become your partner's punching bag.

Portrait of an abuser.  It is often said that it doesn't matter how long you've known a person-When you get married you are basically pledging to spend your life with a stranger.  Still, several sociological studies list clues that point out which people are more likely to be abusive.  According to research the classic traits  of an abuser are as follows: He is controlling and critical; He displays unwarranted jealousy and possessiveness; he feels a deep internal rage; He uses unbelievable charm to deceive outsiders; He thrives on cycles of fighting and making up.

There still no sure way of avoiding involvement in an abusive.  The one thing you can do is give the new relationship lots of time to develop naturally.  Abusers often rush and demand commitment almost immediately.

If you do find yourself in a abusive relationship, seek help before it's too late.

Source:

Anonymous, "Perverse Passion, Why Women Remain in Abusive Relationship."  Working Woman Vol. 1 No. 18