Attachment

Attachment is the strong emotional bond a person possesses with a limited number of people in his or her life. This bond makes us feel good in their presence and comforts us when we’re going through a rough time. This attachment process starts shortly after birth and continues developing during the first 2 – 3 years of a person’s life.

One of the most important theories concerning attachment was developed by John Bowlby, who thought that the relationship between a baby and its parents begins with a sequence of innate signals, which stimulates the development of an affective band in the following months.

The Four Stages

In his theory of the development of attachment, Bowlby discerned four stages:

1. The phase preceding actual attachment (birth – 6 weeks): innate signals, such as grabbing, smiling, crying and looking at adults, keep the adults in close contact with the baby. Babies encourage adults to approach since they enjoy the attention. Newly born babies quickly recognize the voice and face of their mother.
2. The phase of beginning attachment (6 weeks – 7 months): the child begins reacting more positively to known caretakers, but does not object to being handled by strangers yet. In the presence of the mother, the child smiles and produces ‘baby-speak’.
3. The phase of well-defined attachment (7 months – 1.5 to 2 years): during this phase, the child is strongly attached to known caretakers. Separation fear and fear of strangers is developed. The beginning of separation fear coincides with the development of object permanence. When the known caretaker leaves, children of this age are often sad and confused. Through crying and clinging the child will try to keep its parents from leaving. After a while other techniques will be used as well, such as convincing the parents to play 'one more game'.
4. The formation of a reciprocal relationship (from 2 years onwards): toddlers begin to understand the reasons why their parents have to leave sometimes, and they learn to predict when they might return. This decreases the separation fear, and the child will try to negotiate the duration of the parent’s absence.

References

• Bowlby, J. (1982). Attachment and Loss: Retrospect and Prospect. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry. 52(4), pp. 664 – 678.
• Schore, J.R. & Schore, A.N. (2008). Modern Attachment Theory: The Central Role of Affect Regulation in Development and Treatment. Clinical Social Work. 36(1), pp. 9 – 20.
• Simpson, J.A. & Rholes, W.S. (2010). Attachment and relationships: Milestones and future directions. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. 27(2), pp. 173 – 180.