The joy of being a parent comes in the relationship between you and your child. But sometimes there are things that a parent and a child would not agree upon. While the child is young, a parent enjoys everything from taking care of the child to teaching and all the things that a parent usually does to his or her child. But as the child grows up and finally matures, things become different. There comes the differences in opinions, views and principles in life that sometimes cause rifts between a parent and the child. The parent cannot insist on his or her views because the child has already a mind of his own and he sees things in an adult way.

When a child is already an adult, parents couldn't instill in them what they want. An adult child would do as he wishes and forgets that his parents are there. He chooses to go on his own way and he doesn't want others to mind his business. Adult people become the, "Mind your own business," people and hate being told what to do, even by parents. This is the time when parents and children become strangers to each other when things get worse. Parents would feel devastated having reared their children then taken for granted when the children grow older, while the child feels unwanted when parents always complain for their misbehavior.

When my son was younger, I could always tell him what to do and what not to do. When he was already fifteen, we often had a heated argument. He would end up not going home and choosing to stay with his friends in the Internet cafe. I felt so alone and devastated. The feeling of being an unwanted mother usually seeped my mind and I often cried. My son never said sorry but I always said sorry even if I knew that he was the one at fault. I did this just to end the misery that was eating up at me every time he didn't come home.

Young teens often do not understand how their parents feel. Engrossed in how they feel, they forget that parents are very much affected with what they are doing. Everything that the parents say against their misdemeanors becomes a cause of misunderstanding between the child and the parents. It is not easy being told by a child that one is not a good mother or a father in times of slights and misunderstandings.

Disagreeing with an adult child is hard and may cause parents and the child to feel bad against each other but you could avoid this from happening if as parent you will explain to your child why you are against his plan. When my son was about to go to college, I didn’t want the course that he wanted to enroll. He didn’t talk to me for days until I talked to him and asked him to make up his mind about the course he wanted and go to enroll for the school year. We finally agreed on a course that we both wanted. Sometimes you cannot allow your kid to decide alone especially if the decision needs careful planning and it is a very serious decision.

There are lots of things where parents and children may have contradicting opinions. The best thing for a parent to do is to try to be calm in dealing with problems like these. Parents must try to listen to what the child will say before trying to disagree. Talking is still the best thing to do when things go wrong. Listen to your child but if you think your child’s choice is wrong; you can always tell him. Children would always listen to their parents who talk to them.

Adult children have minds of their own and they want to decide things for themselves but parents could always intervene and tell the child which is right and which is not right. It makes a difference to listen to the child and talk to him rather than dictating and forcing things to the child.