Basic Facts About Manipulation in Relationships
Do you constantly nurse the feelings that you are being manipulated by somebody else? Or you feel that somebody from somewhere is taking charge of you life for you? It may be somebody among your friends, at home or at work. Some people are very easy to manipulate because they are exhibiting some kind of personality traits that has been clearly identified by manipulators and it becomes an instrument of control. The first step at solving any problem is to identify the problem, therefore if you are able to recognise those personality traits has been exposing you to a chronic manipulator, then your problems are over. If are exhibiting any of the following traits then you are most likely to be manipulated.
Craving for acceptance
If you are in habits of coming out of your way to please every Tom, Dick and Harry, then you are susceptible to manipulations. However, it is perfectly normal for everybody to crave for societal acceptance because of our terrestrial make up as a social animal. But, some people over - crave for acceptance, maybe because of family upbringing and life expectations. This class of people are the perfect instrument in the hand of a manipulator.
There modus operandi of a manipulator is to use your strong acceptance needs as a way to frustrate your life by simply ignoring every little moves you make at pleasing him/her – he never see something good in what you do.
Making yourself an emotional junkyard
Victims of manipulations are confirmed emotional garbage; they are always avoiding open confrontations because of their sensitivity to how it will affect them emotionally. They are also ready to accept any conditions in order to avoid getting into problem with anybody, even at their own detriment or the person they are representing. A chronic manipulator will exploit this avenue by posing as an angry person or simply raise his voice to set your ever sensitive emotional button in motion. They know you will always bring yourself down for them to have a way.
Little self dependent
People that are not capable of relying on there own sense of judgement and abilities are mostly likely to be manipulated. Because it is clearly visible in the ways they approach real life issues like family, job and relationship. Third parties are always there to straighten things out at will, this is to say that they lack simple leadership ability to take control of there destiny. And consequently, manipulators are always there to take advantage of your weakness and he is also ready to twist all your efforts to his best advantage.
Low self esteem
If you have the feelings that you are inferiors to people around you or you are not really sure of your self worth or what you stand for then you can be manipulated. An old adage that says “if you cannot stand for something, you will definitely fall everything” could be the best connotation for this discussion. Maybe you have been brainwashed during you growing -up years that you cannot amount to anything, this are comments that trails many people for the rest of there lives.
Chronic manipulators sees people like this as a wonderful people on which they can build improve on there over bloated egos, they are ever ready to make you adjust to there whims and caprices.
Finally, there are several other behaviours that can make anybody be a victim of manipulation. But, the most important thing is to recognise the traits and make adjustment. It is also important for a victim to imbibe the spirit of change because it is better to change self than changing a manipulator.