Female Orgasms 101: Tips For Women To Successfully Reach Orgasms
Way back when humans first began roaming this earth, sex and intimacy had nothing to do with orgasms. In fact, the term "orgasm" wasn't even known or created until 100 of years later. Yet now that we know of this joy, both for men and women, we seek to use sex for that outlet. The need to procreate is not so high, so now we choose to be masters of that great carnal joy. The Orgasm.
Now that we have the urge to push for the outlet of our urges it comes to question, "What is the best way to reach an orgasm?"
To tell you the truth, the easiest and best way to reach an orgasm, is in the mind. Sure our bodies have the tools in them and you could reach an orgasm without ever thinking about getting there, but this doesn't happen often.
Have you ever noticed how when you are stressed or not in the mood, that you just can't seem to get there no matter what you do?
This is because our minds control or contradict what our bodies do. So if you are bored, stressed, unhappy, sick, anxious, nervous or upset, it is not going to be likely that you will get there. Whether you are on top, on the bottom or on the dryer, this will make the biggest difference in your sex life.
So, without further ado, here are four great tips to achieving that Orgasm every time:
1. It's in Your Control
This is a very large issue that I have found many deal with, and it's the idea that your partner is in control of your "orgasm" or sexual experience. If you think that your partner is the one who creates or causes you to have an orgasm, you are severely mislead. They are not in control of your body, no matter what smooth tricks they try. You can go through every trick in the Kama Sutra, and you will never achieve an orgasm until you realize that it is in your control, and your control only.
Stop to take the time to realize that you are in control of yourself, your sexual appetite and your orgasm. Remember that you are the only one who can cause an orgasm to happen in your body, and the best way you can do that, is by knowing you are in control.
2. Condition Yourself
When you stop to think about your sexual relationship, it may be all too easy to think about all the things you don't enjoy, all the things that you don't like, or all the hard times you have had trying to achieve sexual satisfaction. This is a form of condition your mind to only look for the negative, or the things you don't like.
So! Now that you know what you don't like, it's time to change the side of the coin, and think about all the things that you do like. If you've had an orgasm before, it's easy to know that you do like having one, or two or three. It is easy to know, that you do like the intimacy, the rush of hormones, the light headedness, the EXPLOSION of love and DNA and joy. You do like those things? Right?
That's good! Because once you can recognize something that you do like, it becomes easier to recognize other things that you do like. The key, is not only to recognize what you like, but to link in your mind the connection between what you like and that tingly feeling in the pants. Remember what it was like just after puberty, when excitement meant that heated wet feeling down there? Everything was exciting!
Start thinking about all the things you love about your partner, all the things they do right. Think about all the things you like about yourself, and all the things you do right. Think about the possibilities of so many things you can try or do, and how exciting that is! Then create that swimsuit area connection and have fun!
3. Stop Worrying
It is a major issue in the area of intimacy and orgasm, that so many of us are so worried that we won't have an orgasm, that we stop having fun with it. When you are so focused on having an orgasm, it takes away all the joy out of the situation. It takes away the whole purpose of trying to reach that state of being in the first place. If you truly want to achieve that mind blowing sense, than you have to stop to remember that it will not do so if you are worried about not .
It's kind of like when you are waiting for something to happen, so you watch that clock with an eagle eyes, hoping that the time will tick by faster, but it really makes time slow down. In your reality, it makes the time it takes to get there, much much slower. So in effect, by focusing your attention on the worry of not having an orgasm, you make the clock in your body slow down because you subconscious doesn't know that you are worried because you want to have an orgasm, it associates that worry with you not really wanting to have one.
In this essence, when you are so worried about not having one, you slow down the time it takes for you to reach the peak of being, that rush, the excitement, and by the time you get there, your partner is usually done already. How many times have you been in that situation??
Stop worrying and start focusing on how much you love the feeling of your lovers body next to yours. Stop worrying about whether or not you will get to the orgasm, because the only way to get there is to enjoy the journey.
4. Try New Things
One of the most common situations or circumstances that we as humans find challenging is when we get "bored". This happens often in long term relationships when the honey moon phase starts to wear off and we find ourselves in a routine that just isn't as exciting or spontaneous as it once was. When that happens we often find ourselves in a panicked situation.
The important key here is to remember that it is okay to be bored, it is okay to want excitement and it is okay to want to satisfy your inner need for external release. When you know that these things are okay, it becomes much easier to not feel guilty about the way you feel. When you don't feel guilty about the way you feel, you are much more likely to talk with your lover about some new things you want to do, to just jump in and surprise them with something new, or to consider the endless possibilities for sexual exploration.
If you find that you are bored with the routine missionary position, the over done doggy style or the once exciting woman on top, it can seem like a troublesome task to try and find something new to do. It really isn't though, and it is only stopped by your imagination. Take some time out of your hectic life to stop and explore how many different ways there are of expressing your intimacy with your partner.
Check out new positions, learn about your "hot spots", get into the antic arts, check out some toys, etc...
Don't let the limitations of fear and guilt stop your from achieving that big "O".